Placated By Post

Let My Heart be Forever Fixed Upon You

2011-10-17T01:00:00.000-07:00

Take my heart, oh God...take it and let it rest ever so deeply in you. For my love has taken it over, my love rests not and goes not away...and loving him more from far away, my heart, it hurts more with every passing day. Oh Love of my life, let me always be found in You. Show me of Your faithfulness, lead me to what's true.

The Doctor & Rose Tyler - True Love Exemplified

2011-08-25T03:41:00.000-07:00

Love is sweetest and defined most properly when it is given with no hope of return, with no expectation that you will receive anything other than the hurt and joy that springs from loving another person with all your heart, regardless of their flaws.

Regardless of their oblivion.

Regardless of whether they will not…CANNOT love you back.

Such was the case with Rose and the Doctor.

Sometimes love can be so obvious that one need not even say it but for the sake of assuring the other person.

Often though, the love is quiet, covered by manifold actions that should in fact display the love but instead rather smother it. Either because of ignorance or apathy or taking those things for granted.

Because sometimes when you’re as close to someone as the Doctor was with Rose, you don’t appreciate the relationship as you should.

Perhaps the story of Rose and the Doctor should make us more thankful for the special people in our lives.

Or make us realize that we should speak now and tell someone the truth about how we feel…

After all, Rose Tyler was brave. She choked back her faltering voice as she stood on the lonesome beach in the alternate universe and mustered up the courage to say what she needed to say. “I love you,” she told the Doctor, speaking through her tears.

The Doctor smiled weakly, bitterly. Because although he loved her with both of his hearts, one of them was splitting in two from the pain of knowing that he could never live the rest of his life out with her.

Such is the immortal plight…to fall in love with a human is the most cruel thing their hearts can do to them.

“Quite right too,” said he.

He paused, briefly thinking about whether he should say it before he made his decision.

“And I suppose, it it’s my last chance to say it,” he began, “Rose Tyler…”

But then his image faded from her sight forever, being swept back into the TARDIS because his time there was up.

He stood there in the TARDIS, heart waning and hope destroyed. Oh, he was a fool, a terrible fool. A terrible fool who had succumbed to the heartbreaking realism of love. All his dreams that he wished to come true were but naught, his happy ending could never happen because it would not be an ending nor a beginning, but somehow nothing but an eternity without the love of his long and experienced immortal existence.

He could not make her happy. He could only be happy that she would be able to be happy with his clone, the man with a human heart rather than his own alien pair of hearts.

Tears streaming down his cheeks, he raised his eyes toward the heavens as if begging for one last chance for everything to be made right again, to have mercy on this his wounded excuse for a man, raging against his immortal soul.

He was beaten. He walked away. Away from Rose his eternal love and the life she now lived with him and without him at the same time. He was unable to give her love and unable to receive it.

Still, he was thankful he knew Rose. He had not a single regret. He was better for having known her. For having loved her and experiencing her love for him while they were able to express it, back when they had their many adventures together.

Perhaps Shakespeare was right… It is better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.

The Doctor never forgot Rose Tyler, as she never forgot him.

Perhaps we were all so amazed and saddened at the events that took place over the course of their relationship because it was not a normal love affair at all.

Oh no, it was much bigger. For the Doctor in all his immortal brilliance bestowed his love on a human girl although she was certainly not deserving of it at all, didn’t expect it at all. And the girl, loving the Doctor through her loyalty and faithfulness to him, proved again and again during their adventures in the TARDIS. He protected her, just as she saved him. Their love was otherworldly.

You see, the ending to their love story, although not ideal, was not a failure.

For true love is not that which always experiences happy endings where movie audiences are overjoyed and applaud at the end.

No, true love is sacrificing your own happiness for the benefit of the other. Rose and the Doctor both demonstrated this throughout their series of adventures as well as their reunion on the beach.

True love is loving the other so wholeheartedly that you know beyond a shadow of a doubt that you will do what’s best for them no matter what.

That you will want what’s best for them no matter what.

Even if that doesn’t include you.

Perhaps the Doctor loved Rose Tyler with his two hearts more than any other has loved a woman in the history of all the world.

Thinking...

2011-08-17T00:39:00.000-07:00

Sometimes I think I do this sort of thing too much. Contemplate, that is. I wonder and I wander, I think and I meditate and and every now and then I lose myself in the world of "what-if's."

What if my life were different? ...Majorly different. What would I be doing now?

Oohrite. I'd probably be asleep.

And not up after midnight, thinking...

Wondering...

Wishing...

What if I was a different person? Would you love me then?

What if I had a different family life? An easier, more blissful one.

Family problems stink. I wish they didn't exist. I wish sin didn't exist.

What if I could re-wind to last year and live as I did then? For I was really and truly happy last year, and the first few months of this year.

Sure, I'm still happy. It just doesn't feel the same sometimes. I don't feel overflowing with gladness or joy or thankfulness like I usually do.

I feel that way right now.

Maybe that's because I'm a crazy person who stays up til the wee hours of the morning writing blog posts about nothing, just whatever I'm thinking, because I'm not motivated enough to go upstairs and grab my journal instead.

Or maybe I'm a cruel, cruel person who enjoys subjecting her dear sweet friends to such nonsense nothingness.

Right, that must be it.

I want something to change.

I need some motivation. Not just the kind that keeps me going through the day, but the kind of motivation that allows me to just STOP thinking about everything I've done wrong and everything I could've should've would've done right, if I had only made the right choice. I always think about those things at night.

They enter my mind before I sleep.

And I eventually drift away, but not before I pray.

Pray and praise God that "tomorrow is another day."

It's not that I haven't forgiven myself.

I just have too much to think about, I suppose.

Hopefully none of you will see this horrid blog post.

But if you do, please pray for me.

Pray that God will show me what He wants me to do.

I know, really vague. Man, my style is rather off so late at night, dontcha think?

Random side note: I've been reading too many Beverly Lewis Amish novels. I want to visit Lancaster County. And Europe (although the latter is not at all related; I've wanted to travel to Europe ever since I was young).

Bye everyone. Hopefully my next blog post shall be more immediate and cohesive. :)

A Most Needed Update

2011-05-19T23:14:00.000-07:00

So I'm posting this because I pretty much...feel really lame about never updating since July 2010. By now my sorry little unkempt blog must be long forgotten. And those of you who clicked this link because you stumbled across it in your Google Reader queue can attest to this. ;) For the rest of you who haven't read my blog before, hi! I'm glad you made the time to read this post of pure drivel. My name on here is Beth, but that's just one of my many nicknames. Those of you who know me probably call me by Liz or Lizzie - two of my favoritest nicknames in the whole world. :) Well, I originally started this blog as an "everything" blog, but I got terribly lazy and posted mainly poetry and songs that I've written throughout the couple years I've had it. But I love to blog about all kinds of things (at least, I know I'd LOVE to), and I just need to give myself a 'little' kick to get to where I want to be in that area.

So, I'm thinking of trying to upkeep this blog in addition to starting another one that will be more generally targeted toward everyday things - tips and info and humorous posts, while this one I would leave for more serious-oriented musings, poetry and such. I haven't come to a decision yet, however - would you do me a favor and weigh in with your thoughts? :)

Thanks so much! You will be seeing more regular updates here until I come to a decision one way or another (and please pardon the atrocious grammar and sentence structure in this post, sometimes a busy journalist/writer's work tires out her poor wee little brain by 11:30PM).

Toodles!

Little Songs & Smiles

2010-07-29T10:07:00.000-07:00

This past week, I've been writing some fun little ditties for my friend. It's been fun to see what I come up with in 10 minutes.
A few of them are posted below. Enjoy, comment, and let me know...if you ever want me to write you something. ;)

Sunny Day

It's a day full of sunshine,
A day to be free.
A day to smile,
Wherever you may be.
You've got a wish,
I've got a dream.
Let's run down to Boardwalk
And splash in the stream.
You've got a picnic,
I've got a map.
Let's take a walk,
We'll make it a snap!
Night falls, we tiptoe
But we're too loud
We're havin' too much fun
To notice there isn't a crowd.
Singing songs, peals of laughter
Echo from the deck.
It's just a mirage,
But this chapter ain't over yet.

Simple Joy
There's no way that I
Can pinpoint the reason why,
When my spirits are down,
Just a smile from you lifts them high.
There's no way to begin to investigate
The simple Joy I get
When we talk and stay up late.
And I honestly don't know how -
This feeling is happening now.
For so long there was a time
Where I never thought you would be mine
And you, you should know, all thoughts aside,
That I want to be the one who won't give up...
I'm sitting here, waiting for the tide. :)

The Part Where Lizzie Comes Out And Sings A Silly Song
I wake up just to hear ya singin'
Roll outta bed just to think of you
Is that my phone that's dancin' while it's ringin',
We're gonna talk, 'cause it's way underdue.
You might be the one that I'm waitin' for,
And who knows what life will bring on.
All I need is a plane ticket to Florida,
Five seconds notice 'til I'm packed and gone.
You're just like the sunshine in the mornin',
With enough light to brighten my day.
You're just like the sugar in my coffee,
putting a bounce in my walk every step of the way.
And I don't know this thing you've got about you,
Spent so many nights wishin' I knew.
Maybe it's the way you laugh,
Or the way you drink half n' half.
Maybe it's the way you set the room on fire,
Maybe it's the way that you take me higher.
Maybe it's the way, maybe it's the way youuu...
Make me smile all darn day! :)

Oh My Dear
Oh my dear,
It seems you've got a lot to say.
Oh my dear,
please bring me a sunny day.
Oh my dear,
you're sweet, my only.
See you smile,
are you happy to have known me?
I am sure it's been way too long,
darlin', since I last wrote you a song.
So here's to you,
here's to me.
Here's to everything
we can't see.
Here's to us,
because we're friends.
Here's to a love that never ends. <3

A Song For Brenna

2010-05-26T22:35:00.000-07:00

For one of my very best friends, Brenna Marie Bakke - Happy Birthday to you, my wonderful 5-year-younger twin, with all my love. <3

Here we are, having the best days of our lives
See our smiles that are lighting up the nights
Never knew such a wonderful girl in my life (until you)
Now and then, and again I think back
Remembering all the things I lacked
Before I found you

I found you, dearest
I found you, gorgeous
I found you, comrade
And a girl on fire for God
The day I met you
Who would've ever knew
That it was the start of something
Greater than we dreamed

I have been so blessed
You name me among your best
I couldn't ask for anything more

Here you are, having the best day of your life
I wish I could see your smile light up the night
I've never had a more precious friend in my life (than you)
Now is the present, and I don't wanna live in the past
I treasure every moment with you, and I'm gonna make this time last
Because I found you

I found you, darling
I found you, lovely
I found you, bestie
And a girl who rocked to Skillet
I'm so happy God brought me to
That day that I finally met you
Because it was the start of this
Awesomely epic 5-year-apart twinness
And what we are today

I am so blessed
You name me among your best
I couldn't ask for anything more (except adoption)

I found you
My beautiful Brenna
I'm so happy I met ya
God gives the best gifts!

Now let's sing this song again
The next time we meet
And we'll dance in the rain
And praise His glorious,
Marvelous, wonderful name (Jesus)! :)

Rock My World!

2010-04-04T16:11:00.000-07:00

Half an hour ago as I sat here in front of my computer, I suddenly felt some pretty intense shaking. The truth was undeniable - we were having yet another earthquake! The last shake-up we had was March 16. Today, the Lord saw fit to give us another Easter Surprise - a 6.9 earthquake rolling in from Mexicali and Baja California, felt throughout SoCal! The quake set high-rise buildings in both San Diego and LA rocking from side to side. Fortunately, there have been no damage or power outages reported due to the earthquake, and we have yet to hear of any damage or injuries. According to Fox News 11, the only minor delays the quake has caused so far are a couple of stalled elevators. The earthquake lasted 45 seconds and was felt as far away as Phoenix, Arizona and Las Vegas, Nevada! Praise the Lord for His faithfulness and protection!

Elusive Dreams

2010-02-03T15:11:00.000-08:00

I remember those days

The ones when you were mine

The nights we were sure

We would stop time

When we had faith and believed

Anything could be achieved

We knew we loved deeply

But the road caved steeply

And when we came to again

We watched for the next bend

And we were happy forever

Because nothing else was better

In our own parallel universe

Yet we inherited the curse

The brood of lust and lies

Consuming everything with their eyes

Killed us, slowly eating away

At every true love we wanted to stay

And we broke promises, dashed our dreams

Upon decievingly gentle flowing streams

But together we pressed on

Assured that we weren't wrong

If only we had known

The Hurt we'd feel

Would soon be shown

Where did we go?

It came on so fast

But we stumbled so quickly

Hitting the all-time low

How did we become

So entirely undone

I remember those days

The ones when you were mine

The nights we were sure

We would stop time

What happened to faith?

Why did we give up the race?

Tonight we're singing out loud

Darling, we were so wrong

To trust anyone but our God.

A Blast From The Past

2010-01-31T17:41:00.000-08:00

So today, I was looking through some memories from long ago. Papers I wrote years back, and drawings and sketches and silly little "perfect husband" lists I made, all saved in a single crowded filing box. One such poem I wrote years back I am fondly, if somewhat embarrassingly, posting here.
I wrote this one when I was twelve years old. 6 years ago. So much has changed since then.

The Morning Prayer

Dear Jesus,

Thank-you for keeping me safely through the night,

So I could once again see the lovely morning's light.

Please forgive me for the tears I caused you yesterday,

Help me to draw closer in my walk with You each day.

Let me have you for my light,

As I walk through the darkness of the night.

Give me the strength to obey, come what may.

Help me to honor you in all I do and say,

And to witness for you each and every day.

In Your name I pray,

Amen.

Beauty Lies Within the Sinner

2009-12-22T22:22:00.000-08:00

The following lyrics are the words to the song "Imperfection" by Skillet.

But they go far deeper than mere words.

They are a truth - one that so many hurting, broken and lonely people need to hear every day.

The people that need to be told or reminded of this truth are people that you encounter every day - they may be your friends, your family, your neighbors. Fellow Christians in need of encouragement and love.

You can make a great difference in their life today by speaking this simple truth to them.

Let's discover what truth is told behind the words in "Imperfection".

You're worth so much

It'll never be enough

To see what you have to give

Here, the speaker begins by stating the inexplicable worth of their friend, and the inevitable blindness their friend has to what a significant impact he makes in the world. I know many of us find it hard to fully explain just how vaulable our friends are. Friends who are amazing and awesome in every way possible cannot even begin to comprehend their importance to us and to others, let alone to Christ.

How beautiful you are

Yet seem so far from everything

You're wanting to be

The speaker voices the truth about his friend's own self-image. Here, the speaker is in awe at how lovely and radiant and precious their friend is, and yet with disbelief acknowledges the fact that their friend simply cannot see her beauty with her own eyes - she has done so many wrongs, and she doesn't feel like she'll ever be good enough for anyone.

Tears falling down again

Tears falling down

Sadness every one of us are all too familiar with...

You fall to your knees

You beg, you plead

Can I be somebody else

For all the times I hate myself?

Your failures devour your heart

His friend is beating herself over the head. How many times have each of us experienced these same feelings of guilt, of hurt, of pain, of frustration with our own lives? We often wish we could go back and relive the past to reverse the mistakes we have made. We curse ourselves and our stupididty. We live in constant fear of turning into something worse than we have been because of our own previous and present faults.

In every hour, you're drowning

In your imperfection

She's living in the irreversible past full of sins she's committed, for she can't forgive herself for what she's done and wipe the slate clean. She's struggling to find meaning in her "pitiful muck of a life" she's created for herself. With every moment, she longs for freedom from these chains...if only she knew how to get it, for it's obvious she cannot achieve it herself....and yet, perhaps if she just keeps trying, she'll find another way to live in liberty from bondage.

You mean so much

That heaven would touch

The face of humankind for you

Here, the speaker shares with their friend how incredible the Amazing Grace of God is. To imagine, that The Lord of all the earth would allow His Son to come to earth for HER. Christ Jesus Himself knew of her sin and yet He still bore all her sin upon His own body, and He bled and died a horrific death to redeem her! He was the Atonement for her wrongdoings, and as a result, He is her Salvation. He is her True Love, for greater Love has no man than this: That He lay down His life for His friends. Jesus considers her His friend! His love is deeper than the deepest ocean, and it endures forever. For out of love did He give this ultimate gift for His people. HER. She was worth His every pain, His dying breath to Him. That's how much He loves her. So He does with every one of us.

How special you are

Revel in your day

You're fearfully and wonderfully made

You're wonderfully made

The speaker further explains to his friend how great her worth is. GOD really loved her. To sacrifice His all, His Child, for HER. And that Child in turn suffering a torturous death for her of His own free will. Now THAT'S LOVE. He also made her in His own image. Now that's special. To be made in God's image. Fearfully and wonderfully made. To be loved just as she is.

Tears falling down again

Come let the healing begin

Only ONE can rescue her from this mess. It is He who loves her like none else can or ever will. The Redeemer. He who died out of His love for her. She must accept His gift and His promise of unceasing faithfulness. She has to allow Him to break her chains, for He holds the key.

You fall to your knees

You beg, you plead

Can I be somebody else

For all the times I hate myself?

Your failures devour your heart

In every hour, you're drowning

In your imperfection

Echoes her every haunting fear...

You're worth so much

So easily crushed

She is so special, but she falls wearily under her burden. She is disillusioned with life. She bends under the pressure. Feels like the weight of the world...will it ever go away?

Wanna be like everyone else

No one escapes

Every breath we take

Dealing with our own skeletons, skeletons

She wants to fit in with the crowd. To be poured out of a mold. Perhaps then, she will finally be satisfied with life. But she's unaware of the truth; the truth being that everyone struggles with the same sort of failures and past mistakes. We all try to rid ourselves of them, in vain. When we do not succeed of doing so ourselves, we must find ourselves in the all-powerful hope of Christ to erase them, and heal us.

You fall to your knees

You beg, you plead

Can I be somebody else

For all the times I hate myself?

Your failures devour your heart

In every hour, you're drowning

In your imperfection

The ghosts are ever present...

Won't you believe, yeah

All the things I see in you

He implores her to open up her eyes and look at her own beauty. She is so precious to him, and precious in the eyes of God.

You're not the only one

Drowning in imperfection

She's not alone. We all do the same at one time or another, so lost in our endless mistakes. So many others are hurting and helpless, but despite their struggles, they cannot gain their liberation from sin on their own. They, like she, must surrender their chains to Jesus, who is able to set the captives free from slavery to sin. She has a choice to make. To attempt her own escape from the Nightmare, or to breathe and live anew.

Jesus spoke. He said, "Come to me, all who are weary and heavy laden, and I will give you rest."

She did.

I did.

The question is, will you?

Will you surrender it all?

Breathe and live anew.

Never Be The Same

2009-11-24T20:25:00.000-08:00

I wrote this poem for a someone very dear to me. She is my best friend, my sister, and my gushing buddy. She is...beautiful.

I remember when I looked her in the eyes
It was the very first time
And I couldn't pull myself away
She was a beautiful angel
She was a bundle of laughter
Safely brought into the world
She became calm and smiled
Grasped my thumb with her whole hand
And in that moment I knew
My heart was forever hers
Her innocence was so pure
And I rejoiced, I was glad
I danced in the song of my God
And praised His name
His Joy was mine
Forever

Oh
Just look at her
Look at her now
She is alive
Oh just think of her
Think of all she can be
She's going to be
Someone's happiness
The reason why
They love God
She'll make a difference
Somehow in some way
And the world will never be the same

I still think back to last December
The night when she first met my eyes
I hadn't felt so speechless in awhile
She was a beautiful angel
She was a radiant beam of light
Reflecting His amazing love
She laughed with me and smiled
Clasped her warm hand in mine
And in that moment I knew
My heart was forever hers
Our friendship would endure
And I raised my voice, I was glad
I danced in the song of my Redeemer
And praised His name
His Joy was mine
Forever

Oh
Just look at her
Look at her now
She is alive
Oh just think of her
Think of all she is to me
She's going to be
Someone's happiness
The reason why
They're in love with God
She makes a difference
In lives around her every day
And my world will never be the same

I recall the heartbreak I first knew
When I heard the tearful cries
Of a mother so hopeless and afraid
She said she was selfish and unkind
She determined to give her gift up
Before the term "baby" could change her mind
I held that woman and gazed into her face
Pleaded and begged her to retreat
From this deed she could never erase
She asked me what love really meant
And in that moment I knew
God's promise was forever hers
Precious child was safe and secure
It was her choice, and she was glad
She danced in the song of her Savior
His Joy was hers
Forever

She said
Oh
Just look at her
Look at her now
She is alive
Oh just think of
of what she means to me
She's going to be
Someone's happiness
The reason why
They're in love with God
She made all the difference
In my own life today
And the world will never be the same

Oh
Just look at her
Look at her now
She is alive

Chosen

2009-11-16T08:50:00.000-08:00

It's time
It's time to break
From this pattern
I've been stuck in
It's way past due
To wait another day
I've grown so
Accostomed to this place
I seem to be frozen
My mind assumed
All my world was broken
My soul cried silently
Calling out for closure
Couldn't bear to break free
From the life I'd chosen
Now I know truth
And I am alive
Feeling my oxygen
From the inside
I can breathe
Chains are gone
Now I am free
Looking at you
It's hard to believe
You are the one
I've been waiting for
Searching for me all along
He shut what I wanted
And made you the open door
I reach out
Can it be that it is you
Will you care or say
You can live without
It's time
It's time to stand in faith
I dissolve my fear
Let Him guide our way
Somehow we both know
We'll have True Love someday.

The Prize Of Great Price: "A Woman's Question" by Lena Lathrop

2009-10-01T10:31:00.000-07:00

This poem is a favorite of mine, and is featured in Joshua Harris' bestselling book I Kissed Dating Goodbye. It serves as a special reminder to keep one's standards high. Though its wording may be old-fashioned, the message is timeless, as it applies to all of us today.

A Woman's Question

Do you know you have asked for the costliest thing

Ever made by the hand above?

A woman's heart, and a woman's life--

And a woman's wonderful love.

Do you know you have asked for this priceless thing

As a child might ask for a toy?

Demanding what others have died to win

With the reckless dash of a boy.

You have written my lesson of duty out,

Manlike, you have questioned me.

Now stand at the bars of my woman's soul

Until I shall question thee.

You require your mutton shall always be hot,

Your socks and your shirt be whole;

I require your heart be as true as God's stars

And as pure as His heaven your soul.

You require a cook for your mutton and beef,

I require a far greater thing;

A seamstress you're wanting for socks and shirts---

I look for a man and a king.

A king for the beautiful realm called Home,

And a man that his Maker, God,

Shall look upon as he did on the first

And say: "It is very good."

I am fair and young, but the rose may fade

From this soft young cheek one day;

Will you love me then, 'mid the falling leaves

As you did 'mong the blossoms of May?

Is your heart an ocean so strong and true,

I may launch my all on its tide?

A loving woman finds heaven or hell

On the day she is made a bride.

I require all things that are grand and true,

All things that a man should be;

If you give this all, I would stake my life

To be all you demand of me.

If you cannot be this, a laundress and cook

You can hire and little to pay;

But a woman's heart and a woman's life

Are not to be won that way.

Reasons I Believe In Life

2009-09-30T13:46:00.000-07:00

I listed my reasons for being pro-life and why I stand so strongly against abortion on a discussion forum about two months ago. Here, I have re-posted the very same reasons I stated in order that you may understand my stance against abortion.
Rest assured that there are more posts on this topic to come in the future, but as for now,
I hope this inspires you to examine closely what you believe regarding abortion and why.

I am pro-life because of several reasons.
1. Because I am a Christian, and God has called me as a part of His family to give Him glory by standing up against abortion, and fighting for what's right. God has clearly commanded throughout the Bible that murder is wrong.

2. What Christ did for me on the cross was the ultimate sacrifice; giving up His life so that I could live. I would gladly do the same for an unborn baby that has yet to have a chance to live and breathe and grow outside the womb. Being the voice of truth for souls that are brutally killed every day is the least I can do for my Lord.

3. Murder is illegal in the U.S., with the exception of abortion. But that's just it, the government and society as a whole label this horriffic procedure "abortion" and "choice", instead of calling it what it is, murder. Abortion is murder, and therefore should be made illegal.

4. One of my best friends, Angelique, who works with Survivors LA, was very nearly aborted 18 years ago during her 7th month of development inside the womb. Her biological mother, who was native to India, had just lost her husband in a tragic accident and would be in disgrace with her family because according to the rules of her culture, a woman, along with her immediate family, would be considered an outcast if she had too many daughters. She already had 2 daughters and decided to go to the abortion clinic in Downey California and have an abortion. If it were not for a pro-life activist who stood barring her way outside the abortion clinic and reasoning with her, my best friend would not be alive today. I never would have known her smile or heard her laugh. I never would've met her, because she would have been killed in that abortion clinic a long time ago. Her life makes a difference in this world, and she brings beauty and purpose and meaning and joy into the world every day. She has changed the lives of countless others and saved the lives of beautiful unborn souls through her work with Pro-life activist groups and at the crisis pregnancy couseling center she visits nearly every day. She is determined to see to it that abortion will end during her lifetime. She will not die until it does. She is the best friend I've ever had and the best person you could ever meet, and she is amazing. Angelique is just one example of the hundreds of lives that would make a difference in this world, given the chance to be born and breathe and bring joy into the world. Everyone deserves that chance.

5. Over 1/3 of my generation has been killed as a result of the Roe v. Wade decision on Januray 22, 1973. Since that day, over 51, 734, 692 innocent babies have been brutally murdered in the U.S. alone. 3, 000 tiny human beings are killed every day. This mass murder must stop.

A Promise Is Forever

2009-09-28T10:39:00.000-07:00

The past few weeks, I have been doing alot of thinking in regards to marriage and the Biblical commands surrounding the institution of one man and one woman joining in inseparable union with one another.

Notice that I used the word inseparable. I'm using that word specifically in that sentence to primarily clarify that God did not intend marriage to be treated carelessly, and secondly, to address the general perspective that many Christians, myself until this morning included, have toward divorce and remarriage.

Sadly, many of us are altogether ignorant of God's original plan for marriage.
To understand the institution of marriage as God DID create it to be, we need to flip over to Genesis 2:20-24. What we read here is quite simplistic and God-glorifying.

"And Adam gave names to all cattle, and to the fowl of the air, and to every beast of the field; but for Adam there was not found a helpmeet for him."
So here's Adam, and he's the only one of his kind. He's the only person in the whole world. Have you ever felt utterly lonely? That's nothing compared to the inexplicable emptiness he must've been feeling. Animals just couldn't cut it, whether they were able to talk or not. Of course he had God, but he still needed someone to help him with all the tasks God bestowed upon him. Having dominion "over all the earth" (Gen. 1:26) is a relatively ongoing , difficult challenge for just one man.

Fortunately, God had a wonderful solution for Adam's lack of intelligent company.

"And the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept: and He took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead therof; And the rib, which the Lord God had taken from man, made He a woman, and brought her unto the man."

Adam must've done a double take when he saw her. They were made for each other, a perfect union as only a union God could bring together.
He proceeded to make the most beautiful speech in the world.
"And Adam said, " 'This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.' "
This was Adam's dedication speech of his newfound love and marriage in the very presence of God, acknowledging that He had created this holy union of matrimony to be everlasting.

Bone of my bones...
She shared the same species and intricate mind and complex design that he did.
He was amazed, and yet completely understood the concept.

and flesh of my flesh...
They were forever one, united in body and soul. Husband and Wife.
No other earthly relationship can even compare to the intimate bond between two lovers in the marriage relationship. Yes, lovers. When God brought Man and Woman together, He did not intend that marriage should be a state of loveless convenience. His perfect design for marriage included not only respect and companionship but also LOVE! Marriage is meant for lovers. Adam loved Woman the moment God brought her to him in marriage. She was created for him to love and cherish. She was the only one for him. Just as God created the first Man and Woman for each other, He also has created a one and only for you. I know there is a one and only God has created for me, and I pray that I will be everything to him, just as Woman was for Man.
Marriage is a beautiful, pure thing.

God continues with the first love story ever told in verse 24:

"Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh."
There's that phrase again!
One flesh.
When two people get married, they are eternally united.
They don't drag their parents or families into the deal.
They are one.
That's God's plan for marriage, the foremost metaphor of His love for us.

Unfortunately, after the Fall, we gradually became apathetic about God's plan for marriage. We continually declined to obey God's standards for holy union. Now, more than 50% of marriages in the U.S. alone end in divorce. Now, even Christians justify divorce for multiple different reasons, instead of referring to God's commandments.
But God hates divorce. He never intended for marriages to fall apart in the first place, for hearts to be broken again and again, for entire families to be divided over it, for the role of the father in the household to be undermined.

Which is one reason why Jesus repeatedly taught about divorce and marriage during His ministry on earth. He wasn't kidding when He repeatedly warned against unlawful divorce throughout the New Testament. In Matthew 5:31-32 chronicling the Sermon on The Mount, Jesus made it clear: "Furthermore, it has been said, 'Whoever divorces his wife, let him give her a certificate of divorce.' But I say to you that whoever divorces his wife for any reason except sexual immorality causes her to commit adultery; and whoever marries a woman who is divorced commits adultery."
How can it be that we pay attention to the Beautitudes, but ignore what Jesus has to say about divorce and marriage?
Thousands of Christians divorce every year for many reasons other than unfaithfulness.

But Jesus makes it clear in Matthew 5 that the only lawful divorce in God's eyes is a divorce by reason of unfaithfulness. But He doesn't stop there. In Matthew 19, there's an incident with the religious leaders in those parts where they ask Jesus a question:

"The Pharisees also came to Him, testing Him, and saying to Him, "Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for just any reason?” And He answered and said to them, “Have you not read that He who made them at the beginning ‘made them male and female, and said, ‘For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’?"
Jesus quotes the passage of Scripture in Genesis 2 once again to the Pharisees before launching into His short but powerful explanation of the significance of the marriage relationship.
The two people entering into the marriage relationship become one forever at the very instant the marriage takes place!
That concept sounds so familiar because at the very moment of Salvation, we are one forever united with Christ! Marriage is the primary metaphor God uses to demonstrate His love and Christ's ultimate sacrifice for us.

"So then, they are no longer two but one flesh."
Jesus uses the very same phrase His Father and Adam used at the beginning of Time!
One flesh.

"Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate."
Herein lies the very inerrency and irrefutability of the words of Christ from His own mouth!!
The very words that are spoken with triumph on the final note of a wedding ceremony today were first spoken by Jesus Himself thousands of years ago!

Holy union in matrimony is an inseparable bond!! It is forever, and the marriage vows cannot be avoided after the union takes place. Marriage is a union so holy and pure that it is unbreakable! Here, Jesus plainly states that there is no justification for married couples to go about trying to tear apart or uproot their relationship. They are ONE. To attempt to injure or deflate their relationship is to hurt both their partner and themself, as well. They are one. God Himself brought them into each other's lives and joined them together in holy matrimony. They took their marriage vows in the very presence of God! From where can they escape His sight? From whence can they hide their intimate bond from His counsel? They cannot ignore God, their avoidance of His statutes only brings them grief. Marriage vows are not mere words of men. They are what one chooses to say with his or her whole heart, knowing that in reciting them to the other person in the sight of God and all witnesses, that from this day forth they are making an active choice to love the other person every day for the rest of their life, that they are willing to work through all challenges that will come up peaceably and prayerfully, that they will stay faithful, forsaking any other romantic relationships so long as they both shall live. All in all, that whatever they do, they will honor God over the course of their marriage relationship with their beloved. Christians should not forsake these promises they make before God on their wedding day.
Because a promise is forever.

"They said to Him, “Why then did Moses command to give a certificate of divorce, and to put her away?”
In Dueteronomy 24:1-4, the passage to which the Pharisees were referring to, God allowed Moses to grant a man a divorce if his wife found no favor in his eyes. The wife was actually allowed to remarry once therafter.
"He said to them, ' “Moses, because of the hardness of your hearts, permitted you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so." '
Israel had turned away from God and hardened their hearts toward His intention for marriage, much like we, both in America and as Christians, have done today. Therefore, God allowed divorce because of their selfishness, pride, and deceit. They treated marriage as petty and careless as we in America presently do.
But Jesus tells them the deal:
"From the beginning it was NOT so."
It wasn't God's original intent for marriage to end up in shambles.
Instead, it was the exact opposite. He created Man and Woman for each other, and meant marriage to last forever.
It wasn't God who ever caused or allowed divorce.
It was ourselves. We, in our own fallen nature, allowed it to happen.

Jesus continues to reiterate:
"And I say to you, whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery; and whoever marries her who is divorced commits adultery.”
God is NOT happy with adultery (He commands against it in Exodus 20: 14), which is why he hates divorce. Divorce for the wrong reasons only results in further sin down the road. In this case, if a man remarries after they divorce their wife for an invalid reason, they are commit not one, but two sins against God! If a divorced woman remarries, not only does she commit adultery (Matt. 5:32), but her new husband does as well! What a mess. A tangled web of broken relationships and bondage in sin. And to think, all this could be avoided if only married couples obeyed God's commands for marriage in the first place!

Divorce is never okay in God's eyes, since His orginal plan for marriage is that the union be eternal. However, because of sin, He does make concessions for divorce under certain circumstances such as sexual immorality or unfaithfulness of either partner. He also makes the exception in 1 Corinthians 7:10-16 where Paul writes:

"Now to the married I command, yet not I but the Lord: A wife is not to depart from her husband. But even if she does depart, let her remain unmarried or be reconciled to her husband."
God commands married couples to stay together, but if the wife leaves, she is not to remarry. Instead, both husband and wife should work out their differences and live in peace with each other.
"And a husband is not to divorce his wife. But to the rest I, not the Lord, say: If any brother has a wife who does not believe, and she is willing to live with him, let him not divorce her. And a woman who has a husband who does not believe, if he is willing to live with her, let her not divorce him. For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband; otherwise your children would be unclean, but now they are holy. But if the unbeliever departs, let him depart; a brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases."
Thus, God commands that if a Christian has a unbelieving spouse, there are absolutely no grounds for the Christian to divorce his/her spouse unless the unbelieving spouse is unwilling to stay in the marriage.
"But God has called us to peace. For how do you know, O wife, whether you will save your husband? Or how do you know, O husband, whether you will save your wife?"
By all means, a Christian with an unbelieving spouse should do all they can to allow their marriage to be kept intact. They should openly witness to their spouse in both their words, attitude, and actions, and in doing so, minister unto their spouse through the Holy Spirit. One never knows what God may allow to come to pass.

God created the institution of marriage to be symbolic of Christ and his sacrificial love for the Church, which is the Bride of Christ. Christians should honor, cherish, and treat marriage as the very thing the Lord God created it to be: a holy, loving union in the sight of the King, a relationship of intimacy sanctified within the inseparable bond of one flesh.

Because a promise is forever...
And I intend to keep mine.
<3

Can It Be True?

2009-09-17T23:43:00.001-07:00

I am feeling
I am breathing
Something new
Is coming into being
Someone is looking
At me with their heart
I'm under scrutiny
And I can't seem to find
Anything so unworthy
As the very heart of me
Can't you love one
Can't you think of
Another self to whom you give
Your everything
Don't you see here
Don't you see this mess
You're ignoring it all
It's impossible to convince you
That I'm so dirty
My hands unclean
Are you thinking straight
Do you see what's before you
I'm ashamed to stand here
You say you want me
You know I'm worth your time
These words you speak
Is this real truth
So hard for me to believe
Can it be true
Can you look through
And uncover my true beauty
You tell me you're for real
You're willing to give it a shot
And you ask me
If I want us to be
That hope beyond the heavens
Where Love looks down
I am ready
Are you ready
We'll soon go with God
And take this chance
After all you know
You'll always be my best friend.

I Trust Him

2009-09-17T11:22:00.000-07:00

My eternal summer did not last, as I thought it would forever and always, and what I dreamed had been a promise was merely hopes dashed on the sharp coolness of autumn. I don't understand how such things came to pass, and yet...
somehow, I know that God's plans for my life are so much greater and of more worth than anything I could ever engineer myself.

With my mind that knows

And my heart that feels this pain

One still mightier than

The cruelties of this world

Looks down upon me and smiles,

Whispers in the wind that blows

And makes it snow again

Amidst my dashed hopes hurled

And with His voice sings lullabies

Protecting me from all harm

Holding me safely in His arms

He rocks me to sleep with His song

And I trust Him knowing

Where I belong

For He will never let me go

He's with me always even though

Others will go away and forsake me

Standing right beside me He will be

And He'll shine down His love

From His radiance around and above

I'll stay in this sacred place

Full of His mercy and His grace

It was for my sin that He did bleed

And His love is all I'll ever need. <3

2009-09-17T00:17:00.000-07:00

Someday, my Prince

You'll come to find

A treasure you can't leave behind

A heart of gold

A breath of Spring

A clean bright scent

Of depths untold

A pure white glow

Of angel's wing.

Coming Back To You

2009-09-12T12:31:00.000-07:00

Oh why I keep coming back to you
When I told you I am through
I never wanted this to happen
To what we were ever
I don't want to prolong this hurt
But you seem to like it so much
When I fall into your arms
Do I have to force this love to go away
Stop enduring this agony
Why do I keep coming back to you
When I told you I am through
I never thought this would come about
I hate being caught up in the moment
Now I'm still in love with you
Why do I keep coming back to you
When I told you I'm through
I never needed us together
Tell me why I keep coming back to you
When I said that we are through
I'm going to find someone new
I told you I am through
Though I find myself wanting to
I'm not running once more to you.

Worth The Wait Part 1

2009-08-29T22:30:00.000-07:00

Looking at you now I see
Everything I know you'll be
Your heart it is so pure
Patience will endure
That's why I need to leave
His plan you must recieve
He has so much better than I can give
By God's amazing grace you will live
I'll always love you forever, please don't cry
I want what's best for you, so I'm saying goodbye

[Chorus]
And soon enough you will know
Why I had to let you go
Every now and then you'll find
Your broken heart with no peace of mind
But darling you'll realize someday
Smile to yourself and say
"It will be worth it all
It will be worth the wait
It will be worth all this hurt
It will be worth far more than the price we pay
You are worth the wait"

It Was You

2009-08-28T09:54:00.000-07:00

This is a song I wrote about the amazing feeling and beauty of true love found in Jesus Christ, as well as the also amazing and beautiful, but not nearly as important; true love found with that incredible special someone.

Leaning my head upon your chest
Feeling your heartbeat
So secure in your arms
Never felt this close to anyone
Didn't want to be either
Until it took me by surprise
And you need to know
Did you even know
It was you who taught me to dance
It was you who showed me romance
It was you who gave me my delight
In mountains bathed in sunset's sight
It was you who took away my fear
In holding me close, for you are near
For the first time in my life I believe
Someone loves me who will never leave
Holding your hand in mine
Seeing your smile light up
Feeling joy for the first time
I never had this happiness
Didn't think I should either
Until it discovered me
And you need to know
Did you even know
It was you who taught me to dance
It was you who showed me romance
It was you who gave me my delight
In mountains bathed in sunset's sight
It was you who took away my fear
In holding me tight for you are near
For the first time in my life I believe
Someone loves me who will never leave
And I need to tell you
Because you need to know
Darling you have made me realize
There's such thing as true love after all
Because it was you
It was you who loved me
It was you that happened to me
It was you
It was you who loved me.

2009-08-28T09:26:00.000-07:00

Abort73 Graphics / Abort73 Shirts

Constant Reminder

2009-08-28T09:01:00.000-07:00

I can't go a day without
Being reminded of you and me
There's an immortal picture
Of the Prince and the Princess
Sitting on my desk
There's an eternal song
You wrote for me
Back when we knew
We were the best
There's a million things
You left behind
That remind me
You and I are growing apart
But the thing
That reminds me the most of us
Is the thing called
Your beautiful heart.

Something

2009-08-28T08:09:00.000-07:00

How can two worlds combine
Me with yours, and yours with mine
Somehow when you look me in the eyes
I know there's a feeling deep inside
There's something we have is very different
Every time I try to speak I'm incoherent
This is so ridiculous, could it be
This thing that's happening to me
People say it's obvious, that they can tell
What's come over me and you as well
We're in love, that's what our friends say
And I smile because I know everyday
I fall in love with you, it's true
But I find myself not knowing what to do.

Heaven's Tears

2009-08-26T10:18:00.000-07:00

Men may travel all o'er the world
Seeing such horrors and sins
They had not even imagined
They will come home from sea, from air, from train
And startle others with their tales of woe
And gain glory and the foll of fame and praise
That shall soon be forgot with passing days
For never has a sadder story the world known
Then that of the Man who had such a heart
So full of love for His dying children
That he left His kingdom and came from afar
Becoming nothing, whence He was a Lord
Suffered heartache and hardships a many
For those He came to save mistreated Him
His own dear children whipped and beat Him
They mocked Him and spat upon His face
And yet in the midst of this ridicule
The Man submitted to a punishment
For something He had never done
Poured out His blood on a splintered tree
Not a noble death twas in their eyes
The Man's Father cursed Him in anger raging
For His beloved He had sacrificed His Son
To die nailed to a wooden cross of torture
Blood and sweat pierced the Man's brow
He looked up begging His Father to stay
But the One in the sky did not listen
The Man's sorrow and agony were so great
And yet He breathed His last breath gladly
To the end without scorn nor hate
For through this death He saved us all
And set us free from bondage as slaves
So that someday we might live in the royal palace
With irredescent waves of beauty so great
And glimmering golden streets to walk upon
Nothing but lovely laughter and magnificent nature
To reside in glorious fellowship with Him
For all of time, from eternity to forever
For this He gave His own life for ours
And yet wherever men may travel
All over the world, back again and twice
They will always come across many a people
Who do such grevious horrors and sins
These also, and every one of us the Man died to save
And yet they whip Him and beat Him
His own children mock and spit upon His face
Rather than gratefully take His gift of love
And Hope for a home in the celestial city
They spite and scorn and hate the Man
Who poured out His heart's blood
For His lost and dying children
Though He knew it was worth it all
For through His death we are saved
They break His heart for He sacrificed
Greater love has no man than this:
His own life for them to live
For all of time, from eternity to forever
So when rain falls it brings with it
The beautiful Man's tears falling down
Never has a sadder story the world known
Than the story of Heaven's tears.

Plea (Part 1)

2009-08-25T20:13:00.000-07:00

I hear your silent screams as you bend again
I see what you are doing
Shoving your feelings into the drawers
Of the chest that contains your heart
Forcing them closed so you won't give in
Shutting me out 'cause you don't want to feel
I can feel the torment even now
Do you know how much this hurts me?
Are you so out of touch with your soul
That you think you can't trust me?
I've been at your side this entire time
Begging for you to share the truth
And all the lies you've told yourself
Give me your pain for once
Let me carry your heavy burden
'Cause I can't stand to watch you drown
In the pool of careless depression
You slowly dug for yourself
Can't you see you're dying
Killing yourself inside this shell
And I look on so helplessly
As you sink even further down

And I scream And I shout
I'm giving you to the One you can't live without
God, can you please help me?
She's everything she doesn't want to be
She's giving up on life
She's going under the knife
Make her whole once more
Breathe Your grace into her core
She's so far away from You
Lord, I don't know what else to do
That little wisp of a girl is my very best friend
And Jesus, I don't want this to be the end
But she's fading quickly away
Save her another day

Beautiful Soul

2009-08-07T17:42:00.000-07:00

You know what I discovered today?
Something so horrific that I must speak.
Something so horrific that I cannot be silent.
Something so horrific that I must be the voice for others who are unable to speak for themselves.
The others being babies.
3,000 unborn babies are that brutally murdered every day in the U.S. alone.
3,000 lives that have yet to live.
3,000 lives that will never see the sunrise when they wake up.
3,000 lives that could've amounted to so much, had they been given the chance.
3,000 lives that could've changed the world for the better, forever.
3,000 lives that were needed.
3,000 children that should've brought Joy to the lives of others.
3,000 beautiful souls.
3,000 trusting voices.
3,000 tiny screams.
3,000 innocent faces.
They are killed every day as a result of abortion, a cruel homicidal tactic.
A homicidal tactic that our government labels "choice".
That society as a whole labels "choice".
For some bizarre reason, soceity thinks that labeling this torturous procedure "choice" covers up the truth of MURDER in the first degree.
Every single one of those 3,000 babies that is murdered each day does not get the "choice".
They are the "thing" that their mother's "choice" is projected upon.
They are the writhing, wailing, grasping, kicking, weeping victim of this horrific "choice".
They are the lost voices of a generation that will never see their future.
You and I could be two of those lost voices.
Because of the providence of God, we who survive are the voices that were spared to speak out for the many millions that have lost their lives to abortion.
Since the Supreme Court's ROE V. WADE decision to nationally legalize abortion on January 22, 1973, over 51, 730, 939 babies have been murdered to date in America.
Over 1/3 of our generation have been mercilessly killed.
Stand up for what's right.
Stand up for those innocents that cannot stand up for themselves.
Speak out against abortion.
Take a stand for life today.
Because every life that hangs in the balance in this war of SURVIVAL vs. MURDER is a human being.
A human being that will make a difference.

Broken Soul

2009-07-30T18:27:00.001-07:00

This is a song I just finished writing and am working on the chords for.
Do you see my haunting eyes
Looking at you through your mirror
Do you see this baited breath
Waiting to gasp for fresh air
Suffocating within your grasp
You stare into the glass
But all you see is emptiness
Filling me with hatred
For you're so blind to the truth
That I cannot escape
Too self-important
You've never found what lay
Before you all this time

[Chorus]
All Love's beauty sang (to you
Every single day (to you)
Voices screamed in the
Silence of the night
Whispered my vows so sacred
Trying to fight a way
Into your cold-blooded heart
That killed my faith

Do you see my tortured face
Beckoning to you through your window
Do you see this wretched hope
Decieved by all the lies you spoke
You gaze into the glass
But all you see is foolishness
Fueling my soul's burden
For you're so self-consumed
That I cannot be myself
Too ignorant to know
That you'll never find
This anywhere else

[Chorus]

All Love's beauty sang
Every single day
Her voices screamed
In the silence of the night
Whispering my vows so sacred
Trying to fight a way
Into your cold-blooded heart
That killed my faith forever

So this is the real you
Always taking the very best of me
Release your smothering hold
For just once let me breathe

I Still See You

2009-07-30T17:49:00.000-07:00

A new song!! :)

When I wake up in the morning
And gaze into the sunrise
Suddenly I find myself
Looking deep in your eyes
I realize then that you are gone
From my sight
I wish with all of my might
That I could fight

[Chorus]
This strange new feeling
That I can't hold on to
Because I still see you
Talking to me in the day
Ohh, I still see you
Blowing a kiss my way
And I still see you
Flashing that gorgeous smile
I still see you
After awhile, crocodile

When I turn off my light
And lay my head down once more
Suddely I find myself
Hearing your whispers louder than before
I realize then that you are gone
From my embrace
I wish that I could just erase

[Chorus]

Ohh, and I still see you in my heart
We'll never be too far apart
To remember everything that's dear
Because you're right here
I still see you in my heart

Contemplation on God's Supremacy - Part 1

2009-07-12T16:23:00.000-07:00

I wrote this entry on September 11, 2008 - the day after my 17th birthday. It is not complete, however; I thought it was worth posting, and so here it is for you to read and to think upon the truths therein.

The more I contemplate the total supremacy and glory of the One who created this world, loves each and every one of His people He has made, and knows everything that goes on, the more I realize His unfathomable, indescribable awesomeness that I cannot even begin to comprehend beyond but a mere grasp of understanding.

The human mind cannot possibly wholey comprehend the vast qualities and characteristics of God, or we are but mere man, and if man were to know everything about His Creator, the purpose of a God would be defeated, hence man himself would liken himself to rule the universe as his own god.

Thus the belief of Christianity would be destroyed, for in essence to be a Christian is to be a "little Christ" - taking on Christ's character and conforming to His image - and Christ is God.
However, our faith is firm on the foundation that God was and always is supreme, immutable, holy, infinite, and ours forever.

God is omniscient. Even seven years ago when Islami terrorists hijacked American planes and crashed them into the World Trade Center and the Pentagon, when they aimed for the White House, when thousands of people that were just going about their usual business on a normal day, when suddenly tragedy struck them and ended or changed their lives forever and impacted the lives of their families and friends...God knew what He was doing.

He had a plan and a purpose for it all, which is why He allowed it to happen. 9/11/01 has brought all Americans closer as a nation, united to fight for our lives against those terrorists, to fight for the freedom and lives of innocent people in Afghanistan, Iraq, and throughout the Middle East.
His plan continues to unfold. We will trust Him.

Facing the Truth

2009-07-11T21:03:00.000-07:00

I wrote this last year on an afternoon when we had a free period due to the rain.
I can see you changing
Into something I don't know
I can feel my tears, they're falling
I have to let you know
That I never wanted this to happen
I don't know why I ever said I do
This place is so unfamiliar
Where have you taken me
A storm brews here
A wind blows near
And I don't know What you are anymore
Who have you become
I used to love you
Trusted you with my heart
One I had once loved
Is now breaking it apart
What is this Monster I see
Why has my love gone away from me
My world is shattered now
Broken in a million pieces
No one can build it up again
Oh, and I've learned to
Never have faith in what was past
I won't ever make the same mistake
Maybe love was meant to last
But I'll always remember what I lost
I thought You were worth it all
But I didn't know what it would cost
My soul is slowly drowning
Don't rescue me, leave me alone
Maybe things will be right sometime
For now I will stand here by myself
And watch the rain fall down, fall down
Watch the rain fall down.

Sunshine's Tribute

2009-06-30T22:49:00.000-07:00

Hello sunshine
How've you been
I've been better on days like this
When the summer's dawn strikes the human eye
And I think about yesterday and wonder why
What happened to this fire so bright
The firelies blinking into the night
Was it unwelded forever by time
Or did it collapse to untouched rhyme
I remember the times we sat and gazed at the stars
Dreaming and wishing of where-you-ares
Never knowing it would all end up like this
That our universe would go so amiss
What happened to the sunset we shared
And all the hopes we boldly dared
When I see all of you minus all of me
I realize the sunrise I now see
And I think about yesterday and wonder why
The loving Joy we knew had to die
What happened to this love burning in the light
The pretty embers now fading deep into the night
Was it unsung forever by time
Or did it fall to the ground in it's prime
Hello sunshine
How've you been
I've been better on days like this
When the summer's dawn is not the same
And I wonder if I'm the one to blame.

Talking To Myself And You

2009-06-29T21:16:00.000-07:00

I love you
I want you
To love me too
But what else
Could I ask for
Cause I know
You already do.

2009-06-28T21:57:00.000-07:00

Someday, this song will be featured in my dream debut. I'm going to hash it out and put it on YouTube for the whole world to see sometime. When I'm done with it, that is. As written below, that's as far as I've come tonight.

It's a lovely
Beautiful, sunny
Bright day
Yes, I say
It's a lovely
Beautiful sunny
Bright day
But love I'm
I'm somehow missing something
Something that's never
Come my way
Could you help me
Possibly tell me
What I am missing
Here today
Now I see here
I hear how my heart beats
I hear it get louder
When you leave
To go far away
I think, love
I think you're missing
Somewhere you've always
Gone astray
But how, love
How could I show you
Show you how I could
Be everything you wanted
Everything that you needed
Every laugh, every cry
Please love, let me
Wipe away
Wipe away the tears from your eyes
And just maybe,
Maybe then you will see
All you ever wanted
And all you ever needed
All along it was me
Someone here
Someone here beside you
All of your days.

Goodbye

2009-06-27T22:13:00.000-07:00

Well maybe I can't hate you,
I love you so much
But I'm sick of this sweet talk
That's all it is
I'm tired of you pretending
And I'm not buying your lies
We always try to make it work
Until something dies
My spirit is gone, it's broken
Because of all the words you've spoken
I wish that I could go back
When everything was great
Instead of all the love I had for you
I wish I'd learned to hate
Now nothing is the same
There's no name for you and I
Except Goodbye.

The True Test Of Humor

2009-06-23T21:10:00.000-07:00

Ok, so most of you out there must have in your possession at least mediocre knowledge of the Bible, if not expert knowledge of events and characters depicted throughout it.

The following are just a few examples of Biblical humor most of us who have long been part of the Christian church have yet to hear of!!

...

Well, what are you waiting for? Let's get to it!

Q. What kind of man was Boaz before he married Ruth?

A. Ruthless.

Q. What do they call pastors in Germany ?

A. German Shepherds.

Q. Who was the greatest financier in the Bible?

A. Noah He was floating his stock while everyone else was in liquidation.

Q. Who was the greatest female financier in the Bible?

A. Pharaoh's daughter. She went down to the bank of the Nile and drew out a little prophet.

Q. What kind of motor vehicles are in the Bible?

A. Jehovah drove Adam and Eve out of the Garden in a Fury. David's Triumph was heard throughout the land. Also, probably a Honda, because the apostles were all in one Accord.

Q.. Who was the greatest comedian in the Bible?

A. Samson. He brought the house down.

Q. What excuse did Adam give to his children as to why he no longer lived in Eden ?

A. Your mother ate us out of house and home.

Q. Which servant of God was the most flagrant lawbreaker in the Bible?

A. Moses. He broke all 10 commandments at once.

Q. Which area of Palestine was especially wealthy?

A. The area around Jordan The banks were always overflowing .

Q. Who is the greatest babysitter mentioned in the Bible?

A. David. He rocked Goliath to a very deep sleep.

The Reason

2009-06-23T18:13:00.000-07:00

I'm so far from then

Now I'm looking back

And I wish with all my heart

I had realized the truth from the first moment

The day you arrived here

That you were the one

Who rearranged my life

Renewed my steadfast soul

You took up all the pieces of my broken heart

And made it for one whole.

Somehow all is right again

Even more than I could have hoped

Or even dared to dream about

For little did I believe

That trust would e'er reenter in

That my heart could ever feel

Bigger than the whole world

So full of joy that I could burst

With such incandescent happiness

For you gave me the best gift

That took me by surprise

Love unconditional forever and always

From the moment you looked deep in my eyes

We are one for all eternity

My own self is now forgotten

Because all of me is part of you

I swear your anything is better than everything

You are my sunset and my sunrise

My love is yours for all of time

Nothing else has so completely changed

This dark void to a bright promise

You are the reason I am alive.

2009-06-17T17:09:00.000-07:00

Waits.
Waits for the announcement.
The one she has been waiting for.
The drumroll heard from South Carolina
Drifts upward and lifts her spirit high.
She lets out her breath as she waits
Yet another hour for the news.
The news of the heroes far,
Far away from their native land.
The youth who in her eyes are leaders;
Those footsteps she strives to follow in.
The champion who owns her heart
Waits still with booming in his ears.
She longs to hear of his victory.

Renewed

2009-06-17T17:01:00.000-07:00

Oh God,
I know only You can fill
This emptiness inside of me
Take this loneliness away
Remake my life starting today
I know I moved far from You
Bring me back where I belong
With You in your loving arms
Keeping me safe,
Protecting me from harm
Set me straight on the narrow path
Make sure I don't move
To the right or to the left
Renew my soul, this void inside
Caused by things I tried
To do on my own
But now I know it's impossible
To live my life alone.

Possibility

2009-06-17T16:45:00.000-07:00

For him who can't be named...

I'm lying awake at night and I think
It's all over again, I've reached the brink
Something we never even talked about
'Cause whenever you came in, I went out
But I know we have a spark, some chemistry
Now tell me, did you ever consider the possibility
Of me starting with you, and you ending up with me?
Oh, just imagine everything that we could be
All you ever dreamed of, both of us in love
I'm not asking you to be pretending
That would just make for an unhappy ending
Just look into your heart and find what's true
And maybe you'll discover that you love me too
In the meantime I have to tell you what I feel
It's something so right and I gotta know it's real
Whoa, I know that it sounds so cliche
But I fall in love with you everyday
And I'm not sure exactly how
Thinking of you here and now.

You'll Be Smiling Later

2009-06-17T16:44:00.000-07:00

I wrote this song after a heart-wrenching experience a few months ago, knowing that somehow, everything would end up right again.

And it is.

Believe me

If there was any other way

I would take it

Oh Lord, you have no idea

How much I wish there was

Now I sit here

In this room in the silence

That outwardly betrays my feelings

Oh God how I wish I could quiet

The noise deep inside

Wreathing, racking every breath

I am heaving

Here in the darkness

The shadows run by

Knowing all along

Where we're going

Now alone in this moment

I'll remember why

When your love is forever

There's a reason all will be better

Though it's hard to be strong now

You'll be smiling later

I promise, you'll get through this

You'll be smiling later.

Taught by love

2009-06-17T16:31:00.000-07:00

Tears freely flowing down my face
I want to love you, to feel your warm embrace
I wanted you to stay,
To be here forever and a day
Because I've never met anyone quite like you
You've taught me things about myself I never even knew
You showed me how to break out of my shell
How many lessons I've learned from you, I can't tell
But you made me live again
Taught me to conquer my pain
You've opened up a door
I don't cry on the inside anymore
Now I express my feelings
And with them come the healings
I had given up hope on,
Now dismal dark is gone.

Not Anymore

2009-06-16T20:48:00.000-07:00

It turns out that I was wrong
What I had believed all along
Once there was a time when I knew you
Now all that you called love proves untrue
After all this time
Can't deny that I was blind
Now everything I see
Is the fool you made of me
Your lies were the thing you had me chasing
So don't be surprised to hear my heart is breaking
Because you dared cut me to the core
I don't believe in you anymore.

Destiny

2009-06-15T20:48:00.000-07:00

Somewhere out there
Lies what you always dreamed of
Somewhere out there
Lies the life we will share
Somewhere out there
Is a future calling your name
He wants you to trust and see
Everything you were made to be
I've seen it with my own two eyes
Your beauty that you try to disguise
Do you know you or yourself better than I do?
That who you are inside is what it comes down to?
How pure and how innocent you are
Although you may not think so
I can see it when you look at me
With those dark amber prisms
Drifting a thousand miles away
All along I knew your heart was here
And now this day please remember
Somewhere out there
Lies what He's planned for you
You're a thousand miles away tonight
To do great things for Him
Somewhere out there
Is a girl whispering her prayers for you
Somewhere out there
He holds your awesome destiny.
<3

2009-06-15T18:49:00.000-07:00

2009-06-15T18:46:00.000-07:00

2009-06-15T18:41:00.000-07:00

2009-06-12T22:23:00.000-07:00

Once upon a time...
In a far away land, there lived an elf.
But not just any elf.
This elf was someone very special.
This elf was an elfin-maiden, and in all the land there lived none so lovely and noble as she.
But enough of all that. This elfin-maiden can kick some serious butt at kenpo karate, so be sure to stay on her good side...but if you can't manage to do that, you'd better make sure the Force is with you whenever you get near her.
This elfin-maiden loves reading, because she learned from an early age that reading = learning.
Although some would diagree with this opinion, I may point out that even if one reads a book that has no real educational value whatsoever, he or she will have learned never to read that book again after they put it down.
This elfin-maiden is a health food nut with a major sweet tooth, although those who don't know better would classify her as a junk food junkie.
This elfin-maiden now enjoys research, as a result of her participation in debate club the past nine months. Funny how finding one's passion makes one so love the hard work that goes into it.
This elfin-maiden is Irish. Irish to the core, with red hair, although in more ways than one she could also pass as part mexican or asian, with the exception of her appearance. Looks can be decieving, you know.
This elfin-maiden jumps at every chance she gets to use a sword, bayonette, or crossbow. She often borrows them from Aragorn, although she will someday soon own a beautiful weapon of her own to practice with.
This elfin-maiden is going to teach Aragorn to ride a skateboard upon his safe arrival back from that battle in the humid, barren place in the middle of Mordor known as South Carolina. He will conquer the Dark Power.
This elfin-maiden will record many an ancient tale of old in new books so that the heroes and battles and romances will never be forgotten by those that dwell in the Shire.
And just in case you were wondering, this elfin-maiden now has complete reign over this region named Placated By Post.
She will now oversee Placated so that no secrets of the Ring shall fall into the enemy's hands.
Welcome her, good people of Blogspot!