A Promise Is Forever

The past few weeks, I have been doing alot of thinking in regards to marriage and the Biblical commands surrounding the institution of one man and one woman joining in inseparable union with one another.

Notice that I used the word inseparable. I'm using that word specifically in that sentence to primarily clarify that God did not intend marriage to be treated carelessly, and secondly, to address the general perspective that many Christians, myself until this morning included, have toward divorce and remarriage.

Sadly, many of us are altogether ignorant of God's original plan for marriage.
To understand the institution of marriage as God DID create it to be, we need to flip over to Genesis 2:20-24. What we read here is quite simplistic and God-glorifying.

"And Adam gave names to all cattle, and to the fowl of the air, and to every beast of the field; but for Adam there was not found a helpmeet for him."
So here's Adam, and he's the only one of his kind. He's the only person in the whole world. Have you ever felt utterly lonely? That's nothing compared to the inexplicable emptiness he must've been feeling. Animals just couldn't cut it, whether they were able to talk or not. Of course he had God, but he still needed someone to help him with all the tasks God bestowed upon him. Having dominion "over all the earth" (Gen. 1:26) is a relatively ongoing , difficult challenge for just one man.

Fortunately, God had a wonderful solution for Adam's lack of intelligent company.

"And the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept: and He took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead therof; And the rib, which the Lord God had taken from man, made He a woman, and brought her unto the man."

Adam must've done a double take when he saw her. They were made for each other, a perfect union as only a union God could bring together.
He proceeded to make the most beautiful speech in the world.
"And Adam said, " 'This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.' "
This was Adam's dedication speech of his newfound love and marriage in the very presence of God, acknowledging that He had created this holy union of matrimony to be everlasting.


Bone of my bones...
She shared the same species and intricate mind and complex design that he did.
He was amazed, and yet completely understood the concept.

and flesh of my flesh...
They were forever one, united in body and soul. Husband and Wife.
No other earthly relationship can even compare to the intimate bond between two lovers in the marriage relationship. Yes, lovers. When God brought Man and Woman together, He did not intend that marriage should be a state of loveless convenience. His perfect design for marriage included not only respect and companionship but also LOVE! Marriage is meant for lovers. Adam loved Woman the moment God brought her to him in marriage. She was created for him to love and cherish. She was the only one for him. Just as God created the first Man and Woman for each other, He also has created a one and only for you. I know there is a one and only God has created for me, and I pray that I will be everything to him, just as Woman was for Man.
Marriage is a beautiful, pure thing.

God continues with the first love story ever told in verse 24:

"Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh."
There's that phrase again!
One flesh.
When two people get married, they are eternally united.
They don't drag their parents or families into the deal.
They are one.
That's God's plan for marriage, the foremost metaphor of His love for us.



Unfortunately, after the Fall, we gradually became apathetic about God's plan for marriage. We continually declined to obey God's standards for holy union. Now, more than 50% of marriages in the U.S. alone end in divorce. Now, even Christians justify divorce for multiple different reasons, instead of referring to God's commandments.
But God hates divorce. He never intended for marriages to fall apart in the first place, for hearts to be broken again and again, for entire families to be divided over it, for the role of the father in the household to be undermined.

Which is one reason why Jesus repeatedly taught about divorce and marriage during His ministry on earth. He wasn't kidding when He repeatedly warned against unlawful divorce throughout the New Testament. In Matthew 5:31-32 chronicling the Sermon on The Mount, Jesus made it clear: "Furthermore, it has been said, 'Whoever divorces his wife, let him give her a certificate of divorce.' But I say to you that whoever divorces his wife for any reason except sexual immorality causes her to commit adultery; and whoever marries a woman who is divorced commits adultery."
How can it be that we pay attention to the Beautitudes, but ignore what Jesus has to say about divorce and marriage?
Thousands of Christians divorce every year for many reasons other than unfaithfulness.


But Jesus makes it clear in Matthew 5 that the only lawful divorce in God's eyes is a divorce by reason of unfaithfulness. But He doesn't stop there. In Matthew 19, there's an incident with the religious leaders in those parts where they ask Jesus a question:

"The Pharisees also came to Him, testing Him, and saying to Him, "Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for just any reason?” And He answered and said to them, “Have you not read that He who made them at the beginning ‘made them male and female, and said, ‘For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’?"
Jesus quotes the passage of Scripture in Genesis 2 once again to the Pharisees before launching into His short but powerful explanation of the significance of the marriage relationship.
The two people entering into the marriage relationship become one forever at the very instant the marriage takes place!
That concept sounds so familiar because at the very moment of Salvation, we are one forever united with Christ! Marriage is the primary metaphor God uses to demonstrate His love and Christ's ultimate sacrifice for us.

"So then, they are no longer two but one flesh."
Jesus uses the very same phrase His Father and Adam used at the beginning of Time!
One flesh.


"Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate."
Herein lies the very inerrency and irrefutability of the words of Christ from His own mouth!!
The very words that are spoken with triumph on the final note of a wedding ceremony today were first spoken by Jesus Himself thousands of years ago!

Holy union in matrimony is an inseparable bond!! It is forever, and the marriage vows cannot be avoided after the union takes place. Marriage is a union so holy and pure that it is unbreakable! Here, Jesus plainly states that there is no justification for married couples to go about trying to tear apart or uproot their relationship. They are ONE. To attempt to injure or deflate their relationship is to hurt both their partner and themself, as well. They are one. God Himself brought them into each other's lives and joined them together in holy matrimony. They took their marriage vows in the very presence of God! From where can they escape His sight? From whence can they hide their intimate bond from His counsel? They cannot ignore God, their avoidance of His statutes only brings them grief. Marriage vows are not mere words of men. They are what one chooses to say with his or her whole heart, knowing that in reciting them to the other person in the sight of God and all witnesses, that from this day forth they are making an active choice to love the other person every day for the rest of their life, that they are willing to work through all challenges that will come up peaceably and prayerfully, that they will stay faithful, forsaking any other romantic relationships so long as they both shall live. All in all, that whatever they do, they will honor God over the course of their marriage relationship with their beloved. Christians should not forsake these promises they make before God on their wedding day.
Because a promise is forever.


"They said to Him, “Why then did Moses command to give a certificate of divorce, and to put her away?”
In Dueteronomy 24:1-4, the passage to which the Pharisees were referring to, God allowed Moses to grant a man a divorce if his wife found no favor in his eyes. The wife was actually allowed to remarry once therafter.
"He said to them, ' “Moses, because of the hardness of your hearts, permitted you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so." '
Israel had turned away from God and hardened their hearts toward His intention for marriage, much like we, both in America and as Christians, have done today. Therefore, God allowed divorce because of their selfishness, pride, and deceit. They treated marriage as petty and careless as we in America presently do.
But Jesus tells them the deal:
"From the beginning it was NOT so."
It wasn't God's original intent for marriage to end up in shambles.
Instead, it was the exact opposite. He created Man and Woman for each other, and meant marriage to last forever.
It wasn't God who ever caused or allowed divorce.
It was ourselves. We, in our own fallen nature, allowed it to happen.

Jesus continues to reiterate:
"And I say to you, whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery; and whoever marries her who is divorced commits adultery.”
God is NOT happy with adultery (He commands against it in Exodus 20: 14), which is why he hates divorce. Divorce for the wrong reasons only results in further sin down the road. In this case, if a man remarries after they divorce their wife for an invalid reason, they are commit not one, but two sins against God! If a divorced woman remarries, not only does she commit adultery (Matt. 5:32), but her new husband does as well! What a mess. A tangled web of broken relationships and bondage in sin. And to think, all this could be avoided if only married couples obeyed God's commands for marriage in the first place!

Divorce is never okay in God's eyes, since His orginal plan for marriage is that the union be eternal. However, because of sin, He does make concessions for divorce under certain circumstances such as sexual immorality or unfaithfulness of either partner. He also makes the exception in 1 Corinthians 7:10-16 where Paul writes:

"Now to the married I command, yet not I but the Lord: A wife is not to depart from her husband. But even if she does depart, let her remain unmarried or be reconciled to her husband."
God commands married couples to stay together, but if the wife leaves, she is not to remarry. Instead, both husband and wife should work out their differences and live in peace with each other.
"And a husband is not to divorce his wife. But to the rest I, not the Lord, say: If any brother has a wife who does not believe, and she is willing to live with him, let him not divorce her. And a woman who has a husband who does not believe, if he is willing to live with her, let her not divorce him. For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband; otherwise your children would be unclean, but now they are holy. But if the unbeliever departs, let him depart; a brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases."
Thus, God commands that if a Christian has a unbelieving spouse, there are absolutely no grounds for the Christian to divorce his/her spouse unless the unbelieving spouse is unwilling to stay in the marriage.
"But God has called us to peace. For how do you know, O wife, whether you will save your husband? Or how do you know, O husband, whether you will save your wife?"
By all means, a Christian with an unbelieving spouse should do all they can to allow their marriage to be kept intact. They should openly witness to their spouse in both their words, attitude, and actions, and in doing so, minister unto their spouse through the Holy Spirit. One never knows what God may allow to come to pass.

God created the institution of marriage to be symbolic of Christ and his sacrificial love for the Church, which is the Bride of Christ. Christians should honor, cherish, and treat marriage as the very thing the Lord God created it to be: a holy, loving union in the sight of the King, a relationship of intimacy sanctified within the inseparable bond of one flesh.

Because a promise is forever...
And I intend to keep mine.
<3